Mortal Monday: My Five Least Favorite Characters

5.  Johnny Cage

Nice shorts nerd.

I know, I know.  Johnny Cage is classic right?  Well, in my opinion, he’s kind of a douche, and kind of a loser.  He’s a washed up action star who’s only goal in the tournament is to reboot his career.  Pretty much every incarnation of Johnny Cage is arrogant and not nearly as badass as he’d like to think he is.  He’s absolutely not the worst MK character ever, but he’s definitely not the best.

4.  Shao Kahn

You arrogant prick.

Sure, Shao Kahn is a pretty tough dude.  He’s also a total moron who seems to constantly end up on the losing side of things because of his pride.  With a little less arrogance, and a little more thought, Shao Kahn could have ruled Earthrealm a long time ago, but because he’s so caught up with being the man, master strategists like Quan Chi will always be one step ahead of him.

3.  Nightwolf

If you look close you can see the tear.

For me, it has a bit to do with his somewhat tacky, over-the-top Native American appearance, and some to do with his generic feeling move set.  In his latest incarnation, Nightwolf has been given a pretty decent character makeover, and he’s become a larger part of the story, but I still find it hard to get past the feeling that he’s going to shed a single tear if I throw that drink out the window of my car.

2.  Goro

Everyone’s least favorite move ever.

As always, these are just my opinions, but I’ve never been a huge fan of the behemoth type of villain / boss.  Goro’s imposing size and extra set of arms just make him feel cheap.  There is never a fight against Goro that feels fair to the player, as his abilities are so vastly more powerful than your own.  While this makes for some typically exciting moments when he’s finally defeated, I feel that victories over more subversive villains like Shang Tsung are more satisfying.

1.  Stryker

Starring WIll Ferrell as Stryker.

Sorry bro, but I just don’t like you.  For some reason, the whole cop with a gun thing just doesn’t work for me in the Mortal Kombat environment.  In addition, Styker’s original outfit from Mortal Kombat III was just ridiculous to me.  To me, he looked less like a cop and more like some d-bag you’d encounter at a dive bar.  While is most recent incarnation his a vast improvement over the original, I just can’t shake my feelings on him.